Reviews

DVD review: The Mephisto Waltz

There’s nothing particularly unique about The Mephisto Waltz that can’t be found in the countless other Rosemary’s Baby-inspired horror films from the same period. Then again, the book itself was unremarkable despite being an enjoyable pulpy read, so it’s difficult to feel too surprised that the film turned out to be equally pedestrian. It’s an enjoyable enough way to kill a couple of hours, though, especially on a cold winter’s night, and that inimitable air of 70s kitsch makes it considerably more appealing than most of its more recent ilk.

A forgotten horror gem or just another Rosemary’s Baby rip-off? I’ve reviewed the R2 Spanish release of The Mephisto Waltz, which bears the distinction of being the only film 20th Century Fox produced in 1970.

Slaughter Hotel

Italy: Fernando Di Leo, 1971

A hooded assassin armed with an axe is trawling the corridors of a mental asylum for troubled (not to mention oversexed) women located somewhere in the countryside. It’s the sort of asylum that’s run by the shifty-eyed Klaus Kinski and stocked will all manner of medieval weaponry. The sort of asylum where the curvaceous inmates sleep in the nude with their bedroom doors wide open and the lights on full blast - in other words, the usual kind. Who could it be? (Hint: it’s not Klaus Kinski.)

There are some interesting colour-tinted opening titles which introduce the key cast members. These remind me somewhat od the opening titles for Zimmer 13, and manage to be quite atmospheric, suggesting that the film which follows them will be of a similar standard. Unfortunately, Slaughter Hotel turns out to be a flatly shot and annoyingly ludicrous affair, combining elements of the giallo with soft-core (and even, at times, borderline hard-core) pornography, neither to good effect. With its theme of insanity and its attempts to marry the modernism of the giallo with a gothic aesthetic, it recalls Emilio Miraglia’s considerably more effective (although still deeply flawed) The Night Evelyn Came Out of the Grave, but here any attempts to develop an engaging plot fail miserably and are jettisoned in favour of scene after scene of sex and/or bloodletting.

What’s surprising is that all of this could have been pretty entertaining in a “so bad it’s good way”, but the film kills any potential for this by moving at a snail’s pace and generally dragging out each scene well after its limited potential has been exhausted. There’s nothing particularly appealing about an ineptly-staged lesbian scene between two uncomfortable-looking actresses going on for minute after minute. The characters themselves are not particularly interesting, although the various “cures” suggested for the inmates’ “ailments” should raise an eyebrow or two - Rosalba Neri’s character, committed, it would seem, because she likes having sex, is immediately ordered to take a shower, an act which has the effect of causing her to writhe about orgasmically and rub herself against the walls (this particular act is set to some amusingly sinister music courtesy of Silvano Spadaccino, whose score is, for the most part, dull and uninteresting).

This is ultimately the sort of giallo that makes Strip Nude For Your Killer look well-made and intelligently scripted. As a murder mystery it fails to work, and as a slice of cult sleaze it’s hardly any more effective. I’m just slightly surprised that such a sexually explicit giallo was made as early as 1971 - I’d previously assumed that this particular trend didn’t emerge until closer to the middle of the decade. In the end, it’s all very silly but also rather boring. Deep Red this ain’t. 2/10

Footprints on the Moon

Italy: Luigi Bazzoni, 1975

Some films are so completely nutty that the only way of understanding just how nutty they are is to see them for yourself. This is certainly the case with Footprints on the Moon, which also goes by the names of Primal Impulse or just Footprints (its original Italian title is Le Orme, which translates as “the tracks”, i.e. footprints). This 1975 piece was made by Luigi Bazzoni and his regular cinematographer Vittorio Storaro, who in 1971 had collaborated on a giallo called The Fifth Cord, which was very impressive to look at but rather inremarkable in the script department. Footprints on the Moon is generally referred to as Bazzoni’s “other giallo”, but in truth I think that label is somewhat tenuous. The word “giallo” conjures up different things for different people, but I think it’s fairly self-evident that anyone expecting the usual black-gloved serial killer affair, as popularised by Dario Argento, will be slightly disappointed by this film. Likewise, even those whose definition of the giallo is broader will probably find the content of the film a bit surprising. The nearest point of comparison I can think of is The Perfume of the Lady in Black, another Italian thriller from the same period which dealt with the similar subject matter of a woman whose sanity is crumbling.

Florinda Bolkan (A Lizard in a Woman’s Skin, Investigation of a Citizen Above Suspicion) stars as Alice, a translator being haunted by nightmares of a rather creepy black and white sci-fi film starring Klaus Kinski as the sinister Blackmann. She believes she remembers seeing the film once, but the dreams are incredibly vivid and seem almost real. Following one of these dreams, Alice awakens to discover that she has forgotten the events of the past three days. Initially led to believe that she has actually been asleep for this duration of time, she becomes suspicious when various clues lead her to the Turkish island of Garma, where various locals clearly remember her having visited only a few days ago - an event of which Alice has no recollection. Even more strangely, they all address her as Nicole.

Footprints on the Moon is considerably more avant-garde than its predecessor. While The Fifth Cord was essentially the work of an experimental crew saddled with a conventional script, this one makes absolutely no attempt to be “normal”. Right from the start something seems to be off: there is a sense of distance and artificiality, conveyed by the careful camerawork and set dressing. The washed-out pan and scan transfer of my copy makes it difficult to appreciate the cinematography, but even so Bazzoni and Storaro’s fascinating use of angles and geometric architecture is readily evident. Likewise, there use of primary colours recalls their work on The Fifth Cord, with night scenes where the entire screen is bathed in blue and a slow motion climax with pumped contrasts and heavy colour tinting. As befits a film in which the protagonist’s mental faculties are being called into question, we’re never quite sure whether what we’re seeing or hearing is real or all in her head.

There’s a sense at times that the imagery is just a little too crazy to be entirely successful: the use of the aforementioned sci-fi movie is, to an extent, explained at the end, but it doesn’t exactly fit the tone of the rest of the film, and much of it tends to be a little on the cheesy side. I’m also not sure I’d call the film as good as The Fifth Cord - its narrative is certainly considerably more imaginative, but it does at times overstep the mark and end up simply being weird for the sake of weirdness. In balance, The Fifth Cord was more successful because it was less ambitious in its intentions. Still, Footprints on the Moon is a unique, atmospheric, and visually arresting film that really needs a legitimate DVD release so that these qualities can be fully appreciated. 8/10

DVD review: A Lizard in a Woman’s Skin

All in all, Media Blasters have put together an excellent DVD, and one which more than makes up for their previous release of the film. It would, of course, be wrong to say that the disc is perfect: the bonus features are incomplete, the image quality variable and a brief snippet of footage still missing. The first problem could easily have been solved by simply including all of the extras from the previous Media Blasters release (I suppose this gives us a reason to hang on to both versions). The other two were probably unavoidable. It’s looking increasingly likely that the extended shot of Strindberg kneeling before Bolkan and then standing simply cannot be sourced from any known print, while the variable image quality is down to the condition of the available materials. Tim Lucas believes Studio Canal to be in control of the original negative, but it seems that they are unwilling to surrender it to a third party, and, in any event, there’s no telling what state it is in, or how complete. It is entirely possible that this new composite DVD contains material no longer present in the original negative, and, as such, I think we should be thankful that we now have, on DVD, a cut of the film considerably more complete than any other version commercially available.

Described by the DVD producer himself as “the most vocal critic” of Media Blasters’ previous substandard release of A Lizard in a Woman’s Skin, I’ve been rewarded for his moaning with a sneak peek of the remastered edition due out in March…

Review at DVD Times.

A lizard in a pristine new skin

(See my previous posts on this release: 1, 2, 3, 4)

My sample copy of the new US release of A Lizard in a Woman’s Skin arrived this morning, direct from Media Blasters (thanks, Richard). As “the most vocal critic” (thanks again, Richard!) of the label’s previous, substandard release of the film, I’m sure you all want to know what I think of their second attempt at this title. The short version: it’s excellent - pre-order your copy immediately. The long version: read on.

First, a little history lesson. Media Blasters first released A Lizard in a Woman’s Skin on DVD back in February 2005 after a lengthy period of delay during which they had tried and failed to get their hands on an uncut film element. Rather than hold the title back indefinitely, they chose to release a compromised edition, putting out a two-disc set containing two versions of the film. The first was a film-sourced, widescreen presentation of the cut US release from American International Pictures, known in some circles as Schizoid. In addition to removing a handful of key dialogue scenes, it also omitted the now-notorious “eviscerated dogs” sequence, as well as making substantial trims to the film’s violence, nudity and sex scenes. The second was a fullscreen presentation of the Italian theatrical release, standards converted from a PAL VHS tape and presented in Italian with English subtitles. This version was substantially more complete than the AIP version, but the quality was, unsurprisingly, poor, and it too was missing some brief material (which, ironically enough, was present and correct in the AIP version). Fan reaction to this release was rather mixed. Some praised Media Blasters’ efforts to do the best they had with the limited materials available to them; others (myself included), were suspicious that corners had been cut and lambasted the DVD makers, finding it hard to believe the claim that these were the best materials available.

The position of the latter was somewhat vindicated in July 2006 when the Italian label Federal Video put out a new DVD, featuring (broadly speaking) the Italian cut of the film, in film-sourced widescreen throughout. Evidently an actual print source of the Italian version had materialised, albeit one in something of a state of disrepair, and this, in conjunction with the same AIP print used by Media Blasters, was used to fashion a new version of the film. As good as this release was, however, it was plagued by a few problems. In particular, it featured the same two cuts by the Italian censor that also affected the second disc of Media Blasters’ release, while the film’s second dream sequence, which features the murder of Julia Durer (Anita Strindberg), was botched, featuring a combination of the American version, which was slightly cut and included a “ripple” effect of the entire image in order to obscure some full frontal nudity, and the Italian version, which was unrippled. A couple of dodgy splices also resulted in some abrupt audio cuts, and even a scene in which the same piece of footage appeared twice. More fundamentally, however, this version was presented in Italian only - a major problem, and not only for non-Italian speakers, given that this London-based film, which features the actual speaking voices of co-stars Stanley Baker and Leo Genn, not to mention excellent post-dubbing all round, plays much better in English than it does in Italian. This version did, however, contain a brief dialogue scene between Jean Sorel, Silvia Monti and Ely Galleani not seen in either of the versions provided in Media Blasters’ release.

Media Blasters’ new “remastered” version, due for release on March 13th, is the third release of the film in as many years, and I am happy to report that they have well and truly done their homework with this version. Mindful of past criticisms, they have put together yet another new version of the film, using the same elements uncovered for the Federal Video release. However, they have been careful to avoid Federal’s pitfalls, resulting in a version that contains almost every snippet of footage known to exist. There is nothing on this DVD that has not been present in a previous release in some form, but this is certainly the first time that all of this material has been assembled into a single cut, and, in the case of the second dream sequence, this is the first DVD to present it completely unrippled and in widecreen. Unfortunately, there are still a few seconds missing here: a comparison between this release and Disc 2 of the previous Media Blasters release reveals that, in the earlier VHS-sourced version, the shot of Anita Strindberg kneeling at Florinda Bolkan’s feet lasts several seconds longer, continuing to follow her as she slowly stands up, running her hands up the inside of Bolkan’s coat as she does so. (On the VHS version, this shot lasts 22 seconds; in every other release, it runs for a mere 8 seconds.) This piece of footage is mentioned by Professor Paolo Albiero in his discussion of the film’s censorship (see below) as being removed at the demands of the Italian censor, so the question is perhaps not why it isn’t present in this release (or on Federal Video’s DVD) but rather how it ended up on the Italian VHS in the first place. Either way, I believe Media Blasters when they state that they went to great lengths to make this DVD as complete as possible, so I suspect that, in this particular case, the shot in question is simply not obtainable. The whole film can be watched in English or in Italian with English subtitles (although three dialogue scenes for which English audio either never existed or was not obtainable are presented in subtitled Italian on the English track).

As far as image quality goes, Tim Lucas noted that this new disc had a rather oversaturated look, and it is true that the colours are more punchy, but only in relation to the Italian DVD: a comparison between this new release and Media Blasters’ previous disc reveals identical colours. As I stated in my comparison between the first two releases, the Italian release has more naturalistic colours and also looks slightly sharper. This remains true, and the rather distracting blue-tinting problem that occurs during the middle of the film is still present (the Italian release, in comparison, has a rather desaturated but far more natural look during these scenes). Federal Video’s handling of the portions sourced from the AIP print, therefore, remains superior to that of Media Blasters. On the flipside, though, the material culled from the battered Italian print is treated far better by Media Blasters, who have eschewed the heavy noise reduction techniques employed by Federal. This means that the material has a harsher look with more noticeable print damage, but it is vastly preferable to the smudged look seen on Federal Video’s DVD. On the whole, therefore, I would say that the relative strengths and weaknesses of the 2006 and 2007 releases cancel each other out, and I can’t say that I prefer one over the other.

As with the previous Media Blasters release, English audio comes in both 2.0 monaural (incorrectly labelled as stereo in the previous release but here correctly identified as mono) and 5.1 surround variants. The latter showcases some rather impressive sound design, combining stereo stems of Ennio Morricone’s music score with 5.1 sound effects. However, it is not a faithful representation of Lucio Fulci’s intentions: the foley track is comprised entirely of newly-sourced, “modern” effects, which feel out of place in comparison to the more strained vocal track, and at times drown out the score and dialogue. As such, the mono version is definitely the way to go, although curiosity-seekers may also wish to give the Italian track a look. Bear in mind, though, that the English version is vastly superior in every way.

A few brief notes on the extras are also in order. These are taken almost entirely from the Federal Video release and presented, for the first time, with English subtitles. These include the original Italian opening credits, and two interviews with Fulci expert Paolo Albiero, in which he discusses the film itself and its censorship, for a total running time of 36 minutes. Both of these interviews are highly enlightening, although it’s a shame Media Blasters opted not to port over Kit Gavin’s documentary, Shedding the Skin, from their 2004 release. A Fulci trailer reel is also included, showcasing a variety of the director’s films, from Lizard to Zombie to Murder Rock.

All in all, Media Blasters have put together an excellent DVD, and one which more than makes up for their previous release of the film. It would, of course, be wrong to say that the disc is perfect: the bonus features are incomplete, the image quality variable and a brief snippet of footage still missing. The first problem could easily have been solved by simply including all of the extras from the previous Media Blasters release (I suppose this gives us a reason to hang on to both versions). The other two were probably unavoidable. It’s looking increasingly likely that the extended shot of Strindberg kneeling before Bolkan and then standing simply cannot be sourced from any known print, while the variable image quality is down to the condition of the available materials. Tim Lucas believes Studio Canal to be in control of the original negative, but it seems that they are unwilling to surrender it to a third party, and, in any event, there’s no telling what state it is in, or how complete. It is entirely possible that this new composite DVD contains material no longer present in the original negative, and, as such, I think we should be thankful that we now have, on DVD, a cut of the film considerably more complete than any other version commercially available.

Tim Lucas on the new Lizard

I’m expecting my own sample copy to arrive at some point very soon, at which point I’ll offer my own opinions, but it would seem that the redoubtable Tim Lucas has beaten everyone to it, posting his impressions of Media Blasters’ new integral release of Lucio Fulci’s A Lizard in a Woman’s Skin on his Video WatchBlog.

Shriek Show is hoping to make good for their earlier release by issuing a new and improved single-disc remaster of Fulci’s classic psycho-thriller that, they hope, will provide the best of all possible Lucertoli for the film’s admirers. Having been given a first look at the new disc, I can attest that this new version is — like the Federal presentation — a unique cut of the film that was likely never shown in any theater anywhere in the world. It runs a full minute longer than Federal’s earlier composite and is certainly the most complete version of the film likely to surface on DVD.

Visit Lucas’ site for a full rundown of his findings: it certainly seems like this release is as complete as humanly possible, although a handful of his references to footage missing from various versions is inaccurate (for example, the Federal Video DVD was missing some Sapphic canoodling during the opening dream sequence, not the footage of Florinda Bolkan writhing around as referred to by Lucas), so there is still room for doubt in a couple of instances. In any event, you can expect a full rundown of what is and (hopefully not) isn’t on the new DVD when my copy arrives, as well as a full-blown review at DVD Times. Preliminary observations, however, would suggest that Media Blasters have come up with a winner.

Stay tuned!

HD DVD review: An American Werewolf in London

An American Werewolf in London is the most disappointing HD DVD title I have reviewed thus far, although it constitutes an undeniable improvement on its standard definition counterpart. Unfortunately, edge enhancement and a lack of the original mono audio mix make this release difficult to recommend to all but the most dedicated fans.

HD pickings have been slim for horror fans so far, but Universal has sought to rectify this with the release of John Landis’ classic An American Werewolf in London. I’ve reviewed the R0 US DVD/HD DVD combo.

Warcraft III: The Frozen Throne

Released, almost to the day, one year after Warcraft III: Reign of Chaos, Blizzard Entertainment’s follow-up expansion set, The Frozen Throne continues the single player narrative where it left off in the previous game, while adding a plethora of new units, abilities, items and maps to eke more life out of the multiplayer and skirmish scene. The basic mechanics of Reign of Chaos, referred to from hereon in as RoC, are covered in my review of that game.

Beginning with 1996’s expansion set to Warcraft II, Beyond the Dark Portal, Blizzard have proven beyond any doubt that they take their expansion sets as seriously as their stand-alone games. Not content to merely throw in a handful of new units and some additional multiplayer maps, they have a track record for improving and expanding the universe of the original without betraying its essence. Starcraft: Brood War in 1998 showed how this could be done, continuing the epic storyline of the original game and branching off in new and unexpected directions, while the inclusion of two new units for each of the three races, far from unbalancing the game, fit snugly into its mechanics to the extent that it became difficult to imagine a time when they weren’t there. The Frozen Throne (TFT) is cut from very much the same mould, with the single player campaign picking up immediately after the Night Elves’ great sacrifice to defeat the demon-lord Tychondrius. The new campaign once again finds us with the Night Elves, and, over the course of 22 missions spread across three campaigns, players also re-encounter the Humans and the Undead.

Conspicuously absent are the Orcs, always one of the backbones of the series and one of the two races present since the original Warcraft: Orcs and Humans. This dramatic change came about as a result of Blizzard not being able to satisfyingly shoehorn the Orcs into the events of the storyline as told in TFT’s campaign, and, as a result, instead giving them their own “bonus” campaign: The Founding of Durotar, more than anything else, serves as a demonstration of the power of the World Editor which comes bundled with the game, allowing users to create their own maps and interconnected campaigns. Playing less like a strategy game and more like an RPG, it seems in spirit far closer to the original “role-playing strategy” premise upon which Warcraft III was founded before they developers brought it back to its RTS roots.

Even within the regular campaign, there is a considerable amount of change. Perhaps to help alleviate the tedium present in RoC’s single player missions, where the same familiar units and objectives were present throughout, Blizzard have thrown a monkey wrench or two into the mix. Often, certain units or buildings will be unavailable, and there is an increased emphasis on using non-standard strategies and units. For instance, threaded throughout the campaign are encounters with a race of sea-creatures called the Naga, and, on a number of occasions, they can be used to augment your forces. Some missions even allow access to their buildings, making them an almost fully-fledged faction in their own right. The Naga, sadly, are not available to play in multiplayer and skirmish games, which is a shame, but it’s fairly clear that they are not as fully realised or balanced as the four main races. Likewise, the Human campaign, which is actually more concerned with the Blood Elves, a group of survivors of Prince Arthas’ destruction of Dalaran in RoC, than the Humans themselves, often allows access to units not normally available, such as elven archers. As a downside, the single player campaign is marred by some rather tedious dungeon crawl levels, which do little other than highlight the often ineffective pathing, as units bump into each other and generally end up in traffic jams as they attempt to negotiate the often narrow corridors.

On a more long-term basis, meanwhile, each race gains two new units and a new hero. Most of these seem designed to offset perceived imbalances in RoC: for example, the Night Elves, who previously lacked a heavy-duty melee unit, gain the Mountain Giant, a huge, hulking stone contraption that can uproot a tree and use it as a club. The Humans, meanwhile, receiver the Spellbreaker, a magic-immune melee unit that can steal enchantments from enemy units and apply them to allies, or likewise remove negative spell effects from allies and apply them to enemies. Each race additionally gains a new building, a shop, from which a variety of race-dependent weapons can be bought: the Night Elves, for instance, can purchase a Moonstone, which immediately sets the time of day to night for a brief period, allowing them to recharge their Moon Wells or hide their forces in the shadows; the Undead, meanwhile, can buy an Orb of Corruption, which allows them to instantly generate an area of Blight on the ground upon which to construct buildings. Finally, a new neutral outpost, the Tavern, is included on many maps, allowing players to recruit neutral heroes instead of being restricted to their own race’s choice of four. This allows for more varied and less predictable strategies, and Blizzard’s inclusion of new heroes with many of their patches has kept the game and its play-styles continually evolving. Naval transports and combat ships, last seen in Warcraft II, also make a welcome reappearance, although they are, for the most part, restricted to two or three levels in the single player campaign.

The Frozen Throne carries on Warcraft III in fine tradition. It may not do much to alleviate some of the game’s inherent flaws, such as the small-scale nature of the battles and at times derivative nature of the plot, but, if you enjoyed Warcraft III, then you will probably have come to accept these or at least take them in their stride. In any event, the additions help to expand the scope of the game and fill out some of the weaker elements of the various races. As strategy games go, you can definitely do a lot worse than Warcraft III, and this expansion proves that there is not necessarily anything wrong with more of the same.

8/10.

HD DVD review: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire seems to be considered by many fans of the franchise to be the worst film in the series so far, but, whether it’s because I wouldn’t class myself as a Harry Potter fan or for other reasons, my reaction to it was quite the opposite. I still don’t really understand what it is that makes so many people fanatical about this series (I expect that I would have to read the books to get my head around that), and it hasn’t given me any particular desire to rush to the cinema and see Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix when it is released in cinemas in July, but, as a stand-alone film, this fourth part in the septology is a nicely-executed if meandering piece that should engage both children and adults, whether or not they have read the books.

For the first HD review of 2007, I take a look at Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, released in the UK in December 2006 but yet to appear anywhere else in the world. Warner’s disc features a stunning transfer and an exclusive In-Movie Experience feature.

Zimmer 13

Note: thanks to Keith for setting me up with a copy of this film.

West Germany/Denmark/France: Harald Reinl, 1964

Zimmer 13 (Room 13) is my first encounter with the krimi movement, a series of thrillers produced in Germany during the late 1950s to early 1970s based on the writings of British novelist Edgar Wallace and his son Bryan Edgar Wallace. These films are often compared to the Italian giallo movement, and indeed many gialli were marketed in Germany is krimis - for example The Bird with the Crystal Plumage, What Have You Done to Solange? and Seven Bloodstained Orchids. Compared with their Italian counterparts, these films tend to emphasise professional detectives and organised crime rather than amateur sleuths up against lone madmen, while the (70s) Italian modernism favoured by giallo directors tends to be eschewed in favour of an image of what appears to be a pre-World War 2 England.

I’m feeling in the dark here, so bear with me. The plot focuses on a private detective, Johnny Gray (Joachim Fuchsberger, who also appeared in Solange, further emphasising the krimi connection), asigned to protect Denise (Karin Dor), the daughter of Sir Marney (Walter Rilla), who finds himself owing a favour to the wrong crowd and fears for her safety. There’s also a razor-wielding maniac on the loose, and a maverick ganster named Joe Legge (Richard Häussler), planning a grand heist with his lackeys in the ominous Room 13.

The strongest element of the film, and its most giallo-like part, is the mystery surrounding the identity of the razor killer. I didn’t guess the outcome, and it came as significantly surprising, although I tend not to think too analytically about a killer’s identity the first time I watch a film. The heist itself, as it happens, is not particularly interesting or remarkable - the whole thing is made out to be intricately planned, right down to the second, but in reality it’s just a run of the mill train robbery. The ominous-sounding Room 13 also turns out to be anything but - it’s just a room in a club where the gansters meet (given that the film is named after it, I was expecting a little more).

Still, the film is nicely-paced, and the monochromatic Scope photography, by Ernst W. Kalinke, is rich and evocative (I always considered a shame that so few gialli were shot in black and white, with Mario Bava’s The Girl Who Knew Too Much being pretty much the only one I can recall right now). Elsewhere, Fuchsberger makes a reasonably effective lead, even if he’s not particularly convincing as a “brilliant” detective - a failing of the script rather than his performance. Karin Dor is also a sympathetic heroine/damsel in distress, cut from the Nora Davis (to again reference The Girl Who Knew Too Much) mould - vulnerable, but not completely gutless. Some attempts at comic relief, most involving bumbling police scientist Dr. Higgins (Eddi Arent), don’t work particularly well, given that they tend to crop up at the most inappropriate moments - usually immediately following a death.

As my first krimi, I don’t really know how this compares to the rest of the line-up. Chances are I’ve either slated what is considered a masterpiece or bigged-up a clunker. Who knows. I also have Dead Eyes of London to watch, so maybe I’ll have a better idea of what these films are generally like soon. In the meantime, this gets a 7/10.

The Year in Review

2006 - the year of HD

Note: I’m not going to cover worldwide hot topics like the execution of Saddam Hussein or the continued botch-job that is the situation in Iraq. This is simply a set of personal musings about my own experiences this year.

On a technological front, by far the biggest development on the HMS Whimsy this year was the arrival of an HD DVD player - a late change from our original intention to pick up a Blu-ray player. Originally, I had expected to perhaps have half a dozen titles in high definition by the end of the year, but have in fact ended up with 21 (plus another two that Lyris bought). Certainly a number of these are films that I probably wouldn’t have bought had their been a better selection available, but still, if you’d told me that, a mere six months after its launch, the format would included crystal-clear copies of Casablanca and The Adventures of Robin Hood, not to mention more obscure cult titles like An American Werewolf in London and Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, I wouldn’t have believed you. All in all, HD DVD got off to a great start in 2006, with I only hope will continue to be bettered in 2007.

Including both standard definition and high definition, I bought or received for review a total of 107 DVDs. I wrote 66 reviews for DVD Times (two down from last year’s record of 68), and went to the cinema a whopping two times. I watched 216 films (including those watched more than once), 99 of which I had never seen before. These tended to be of the more obscure variety, although I did see a number of “major” (both in the sense of being “important” and of being blockbusters that just about everyone ended up seeing) titles that had, for one reason or another, passed me by until last year, including Trains, Planes & Automobiles, Welcome to the Dollhouse, Sympathy for Lady Vengeance, The Tragedy of Macbeth, Blade Runner, Tout Va Bien, Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit, Collateral, Corpse Bride, The Piano Teacher, Theatre of Blood, A History of Violence, V for Vendetta, 5x2, Bitter Moon, Walkabout, Fritz the Cat, Vertigo, Exorcist II: The Heretic, The Descent, The Constant Gardener, Serenity, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest, The Bourne Identity, The Bourne Supremacy, Duck Soup, Strictly Ballroom, The Fifth Element, Ghost World, Cars, Investigation of a Citizen Above Suspicion, Being John Malkovich, Black Sunday, The Omen (remake), Witchfinder General, Topaz, Torn Curtain, Casino Royale, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Miami Vice, Basic Instinct and The Adventures of Robin Hood. Quite clearly, this list features some real gems and some absolute garbage, including gems that I thought would be garbage and garbage that I thought would be gems.

In terms of television, meanwhile, I watched the first two seasons of Veronica Mars and the final season of Alias. I also went through the entire seven-season run of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, with its steadily diminishing returns post-Season 5 gradually driving me towards the brink of suicide (I exaggerate). The long-running medical drama Casualty also celebrated its 20th anniversary, with the launch of the first three series on DVD - it’s anyone’s guess how long they will continue this, given that each series becomes progressively longer, until they eventually run for more or less the entire year. Speaking of Casualty, that particular show shocked me in delivering perhaps the best two hours of television I’d seen all year, with the much-heralded return of former writer (and Waking the Dead creator) Barbara Machin for a one-off guest writing gig. Much to my delight, the magnificent Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace was finally released on DVD, although the same team’s follow-up, the satirical chat-show Man to Man with Dean Learner, turned out to be a huge disappointment. The fifth season of Spooks also aired, and, while it was suitably engaging, it sacrificed some of the subtlety of previous years in favour of increasingly unbelievable conspiracies and hostile takeovers. Oh, and on the TV/film front, Channel 4’s dedicated film channel, FilmFour, became free in July, providing the UK with its first free-to-air channel dedicated to movies.

After over a year’s worth of procrastination, I finally recorded a new fan commentary, this time for Dario Argento’s Profondo Rosso. Once again, feedback for this seems to have been largely positive, although it’s anyone’s guess what I’ll think of it myself when I finally brave listening to it again.

The Third Mother, the long-awaited conclusion to Argento’s Three Mothers trilogy (started with Suspiria and Inferno in 1977 and 1980 respectively), finally went into production, wrapping at some point in late November/early December, with a projected May 2007 release date. Argento also helmed another episode in the American Masters of Horror television series: Pelts turned out to be less shameful than 2005’s Jenifer, but a far cry from his home-grown exploits nonetheless. Meanwhile, the much-feared Hollywood remake of Suspiria was finally axed.

After much talk of the two companies going their separate ways, Disney bought Pixar and instated John Lasseter as the joint president of feature animation for both studios. Shortly before the end of the year, it was announced that, following the release of Meet the Robinsons, Disney would be abandoning CG animation entirely and returning to the hand-drawn realm in which it made its name.

Once more in the animated world, John Kricfalusi, the creator of The Ren & Stimpy Show and the industry’s last great hope, started up an excellent blog in February. July also saw the release on DVD of Ren & Stimpy: The Lost Episodes, containing six new installments featuring everyone’s favourite dog and cat duo, three of which had never even aired on TV. Sadly, there seems to be no indication that sales of the DVD have persuaded Paramount to order more episodes.

I got into computer games this year to a far greater extent than I had for some time, picking up Guild Wars: Factions, Guild Wars: Nightfall, The Movies: Stunts and Effects, Dreamfall: The Longest Journey and Lara Croft: Tomb Raider: Legend, as well as replaying Baldur’s Gate II: Shadows of Amn, Icewind Dale II, Starcraft: Brood War and Warcraft III: Reign of Chaos. Lyris also picked up the new Nintendo Wii console in November, resulting in much enjoyment as all on sundry made asses of themselves waving its newfangled controller about. Oh, and Blizzard Entertainment “postponed indefinitely” (read “cancelled”) its troubled console action game Starcraft: Ghost, much to the disappointment of the three or four people that still cared about it.

I also bought rather more technological gadgets than is normal for me: I picked up a digital camera in February, and a swish new widescreen LCD monitor in June. I also replaced my Creative Zen Micro MP3 player with a Sony NW-HD5 in November, and made the mistake of buying an nVidia-based video card for my computer in December (the replacement ATI model will hopefully arrive soon after business returns to normal after the New Year holiday).

In September, I finally finished my MLitt, handed in my dissertation, and, much to my shock, was awared a Distinction. Unable to find a job, I went on unemployment benefit - what fun.

Oh, and on the web site front, September saw a new site design and a return to Movable Type as a publishing platform after slightly over a year with Blogger. In November, meanwhile, I finally got sick of my useless host, Fuitadnet, constantly screwing up and making life difficult, and moved to Donym, where the rent is cheaper and everything runs much more smoothly to boot.

Lara Croft: Tomb Raider: Legend

With the release of Tomb Raider back in 1996, Core Design struck gold and gave the gaming industry its first true action heroine, Lara Croft - even if her gender and ample bosom arguably contributed far more to its success than any actual merit of the gameplay itself. Following the remarkable success of the first game, Core followed up with a sequel every year, with the law of diminishing returns ensuring that each subsequent instalment was inferior to its predecessors, until, following a three-year break after the half-hearted Tomb Raider: Chronicles, the Derby-based studio released the disastrous Tomb Raider: The Angel of Darkness, a supposed drastic reimagining that, in reality, shambled on to the scene as an unfinished, buggy mess. The Angel of Darkness was so bad that publisher Eidos Interactive yanked development duties away from Core (an embarrassing situation, beyond any doubt) and handed them over to Crystal Dynamics, the US-based developer of the Legacy of Kain franchise. Tomb Raider: Legend, their first effort featuring the buxom adventurer, was eventually released in Spring 2006, three years after Core’s final offering. The result: the best Tomb Raider game in years and arguably the first truly great instalment in the franchise.

Crystal Dynamics have wisely struck a balance between reinventing the game from the ground up and leaving enough of the original format to make it instantly familiar to those that have played its predecessors. One of the biggest criticisms of the various sequels was that they made the “Tomb” in Tomb Raider something of a joke, with Lara travelling to seemingly every location except actual tombs. Crystal Dynamics have rectified this, and, while there are certainly some diverse locations on display, including a trip to the skyscrapers of Tokyo at night, the bulk of the game takes place in various underground caverns and mausoleums. Including the fairly brief final boss fight, there are a total of eight different locations, most of them fairly sprawling although never daunting in their scale, with an estimated total of 10-15 hours of gameplay (according to the timer, I finished it in 9 hours and 36 minutes).

It’s all over rather quickly, therefore, and I certainly found myself wishing it had gone on for a little longer, although various hidden goodies, which can be picked up to unlock bonus costumes and weapon upgrades, as well as a time trial option, do encourage you to replay the game. At the same time, Legend seems far less impenetrable than, say, Tomb Raider III, which eventually turned into giant sprawling level after giant sprawling level of tedium. It also helps that Legend’s gameplay feels far more concentrated than many of its predecessors, with a focus on puzzles that can be completed using items already at your disposal rather than having to trek across huge levels to find an obscure button that will open a random door. Indeed, very few puzzles even require you to leave the room in which they are located, meaning that accomplishing your immediate objective is always within your grasp, thereby encouraging you to keep playing rather than simply giving up. The puzzles are also very logical, and indeed many even seem a little too straightforward, given that Lara or her various associates will often offer handy hints as to what needs to be done.

Crystal Dynamics have also reined in the frustration factor inherent in the constant deaths and restarts incurred during the previous games - a combination of their cumbersome controls and the games’ demandingly exact grid-based movement system. Previously, even a simple jump from one block to another would be fraught with danger, as, chances were that you would line Lara up slightly wrong and end up missing your target. Legend is far more forgiving, in the sense that, provided you aim in the general vicinity of where you intend to go, chances are that Lara will automatically adjust her trajectory mid-jump and land where you want her. On the PC version, accuracy is also much-aided by finally allowing players to use the traditional mouse-and-keyboard combination favoured by every action game for years (this function was also present in The Angel of Darkness, although it did little to improve playability due to that game’s clunky movement). As a result, Legend is infinitely smoother and more natural to control than any of its predecessors, meaning that gamers can actually play the game instead of wrangling with its basic mechanics.

A considerable amount of effort has also been invested in the story, which is of a more personal nature, given that it involves the fate of Lara’s dead parents (the storyline has been modified somewhat since the first game to tie in better with the two film adaptations, although there are still some key differences between these two strands of the franchise) and a group of fellow explorers, many of whom came to a sticky end during a grave-digging jaunt in Paraíso. The various in-game cut-scenes are highly effective, with Lara ably voiced by actress Keeley Hawes (who played Zoe in the first three seasons of Spooks). Her banter with her various assistants, who keep in contact with her via a headset, is often quite funny, although there are a few clunkers, and, on occasions in which a particularly tricky puzzle requires multiple attempts (which are, admittedly, laudably few in number), the continued repetition of the same zingers becomes a little tiresome. Graphically, the game is also very impressive, with only a handful of blocky textures, which the art direction and level design do an admirable job of concealing the fact that the game is ultimately still based around jumping from one square block of ground to the next.

Where the gameplay is a little less impressive is in terms of its combat. It all feels a bit perfunctory, with very little possible variation beyond simply jumping about and pumping enemies with lead before they can finish you off. At Medium difficulty, the game is fairly generous in terms of doling out ammo and health packs (you can carry up to three at a time), while guns are limited to only a few variations (in addition to the now-standard pistols, you can carry only one other weapon at a time). It is possible to jump on top of human enemies to knock them down, which causes the game to enter into slow motion, allowing you to more precisely execute them, although the occasions on which this can be done (and indeed when this is actually worthwhile) are relatively few. The various bosses, meanwhile, which conclude most of the levels, can initially seem a little daunting, but are generally fairly straightforward once you work out the central puzzle, with very few of them requiring much in the way of dodging and acrobatics. A handful of motorcycle chases also tend to be a little frustrating, given that their controls are much more clunky than the game proper (the mouse, annoyingly, can’t be used for steering).

Tomb Raider: Legend is ultimately a highly enjoyable game. It may not be particularly lengthy or taxing, but it is a beautifully-presented adventure with slick controls, an engaging plot and some fun puzzles. It doesn’t reinvent the wheel, but it certainly salvages an aging franchise, breathing life into a series that I had otherwise given up on.

8/10.

Warcraft III: Reign of Chaos

Blizzard Entertainment released their original real-time strategy Warcraft: Orcs & Humans in 1994. This was followed in 1995 by the groundbreaking Warcraft II: Tides of Darkness, which refined the formula, adding improved graphics and sound, as well as taking the conflict into the air and sea with the inclusion of flying units and ships. 1998’s Starcraft, however, remains arguably their most polished RTS to date, and continues to be considered the best PC game ever by many players, both casual and professional. Thanks to Blizzard’s continued adage that their games be easy to play but difficult to master (in other words, the basic mechanics are straightforward, allowing newcomers to immediately begin playing without needing to devour a huge manual, but at the same time requiring patience and skill to become a truly impressive player), they delivered a nuanced, balanced game with a solid audio-visual presentation and exciting, addictive gameplay. The game was so good that virtually no other RTS could get a word in edgeways, and that remained the case for many years, although Ensemble Studio’s Age of Empires II: The Age of Kings certainly put up a worthy fight.

2002’s Warcraft III: reign of Chaos, therefore, had a lot to live up to. When it was initially announced at ECTS in 2001, Blizzards’ spokespeople declared that, as the studio felt it had taken RTS gaming as far as it could go with Starcraft, it was going to focus on a new model for the third instalment of the Warcraft saga. The game was touted as an “RPS” - a role-playing strategy, sidelining the traditional strategy activities of base management and unit production in favour of a more tactical approach, emphasising exploration and intense, small-scale battles between powerful hero units, whose strength and abilities would improve with experience. In its initial demonstrations, the game looked rather similar to Myth: The Fallen Lords, sporting a 3D engine and with a camera view locked behind the heroes’ heads, close to the horizon line.

Initial reactions were mixed at best, with Blizzard’s impressive track record and brand loyalty being enough to convince some gamers that this would be the best thing since sliced bread, or at least since Starcraft, but others, sensing a move away from the 2D RTS format that had made the company such a success, were considerably more sceptical. Many were greatly relieved, therefore, when, only a few months after it had been announced, Blizzard declared that it was going to reign in the role-playing elements and bring the game back to its strategy roots.

The finished game, therefore, has a lot in common with its spiritual predecessors, sporting the same basic user interface as Starcraft and once again following the formula of building a base, training units and vanquishing the opposing team. The engine remains 3D, but the camera itself stays, for the most part, locked into a top-down isometric perspective heavily reminiscent of its 2D predecessors. To call Warcraft III the immediate successor to the Starcraft throne would, however, be inaccurate, because, despite the similarities, much has changed. The appearance and core mechanics will still be instantly familiar to anyone who has played any of Blizzard’s previous RTS games, but those who approach this in the same manner as Warcraft II or Starcraft, expecting the same basic strategies and play styles to work, will be in for a surprise.

While the role-playing elements may have been reigned in, they have not been obliterated by a long shot. The backbone of the game is still building up a strong base and maintaining a solid economy, but a low unit cap and a focus on special hero units who must kill enemy units in order to level up and access new abilities means that there is a greater dependence than ever on micro-managing battles. In Starcraft, for example, a Zerg player might simply amass a hundred similar units, send them in the direction of their opponent’s base, and beat them into submission through sheer weight of numbers, but such a strategy (if you can even call it strategy) would never work against a moderately skilled player in Warcraft III. The old rock-paper-scissors system at the heart of all the -craft games has been emphasised considerably, meaning that even the most powerful unit in the game can be completely neutralised by the correct counter.

The result of this is that smart selection of appropriate units and skilled management of the player’s army is rewarded to a far greater extent than in the previous games. There is no longer a be-all and end-all strategy that can be memorised and used to win every game, which in theory leads to a more varied gameplay experience. In practice, of course, a brief glance at the various replays available on the Internet will reveal that the same basic strategies tend to be favoured (virtually every Human player chooses the Archmage as their first hero, for instance), but even within these basic templates there is more variety. Players can now quickly adapt their strategies to counter an opponent by, for example, retraining their heroes with a different selection of skills (for a price, of course), while high level players will frequently engage in minute micro-management of battles, “dancing” with their units in order to conserve as many hit points as possible.

And yet, despite this shift from large-scale macro-management to small-scale micro-management, little has ultimately changed. The objective of the majority of multiplayer skirmishes is still to destroy the enemy’s base, while the removal of sea units (leaving just land and air) actually feels like something of a step backwards from Warcraft II. Blizzard’s -craft formula has endured over the years for a reason, so perhaps the decision to retain the same basic mechanics, almost down to a T, was a wise one. The improvements are generally more subtle - you can, for example, queue up worker units to construct multiple buildings, as well as add weapon, armour and spell upgrades to production queues. Additionally, once a worker finishes building a resource centre, he will then automatically begin harvesting the relevant resource (for example, a Peasant who has finished constructing a Lumber Mill will go to the nearest tree and begin chopping). The result of these subtle refinements is that, once you get used to them, it becomes difficult to go back to an earlier game in the series and learn to adapt to playing without them.

With Starcraft, Blizzard introduced the groundbreaking idea of having each of its three playable factions being completely different from one another, and therefore requiring completely different play styles, while at the same time wrangling the seemingly impossible task of balancing them so that no race had an advantage over the other. By increasing the number of races to four for Warcraft III (actually reduced from an originally projected six), the developers made that task even harder for themselves, and generally manage to pull it off quite successfully. Ultimately, the same basic principles remain for each faction - each race has a worker unit who harvests gold from a gold mine, for example - but little subtleties ensure that they don’t do everything the same way. Orcs and Humans, for example, can harvest gold directly from the mine, but the Undead and Night Elves must first construct an additional structure on top of the mine, with their worker units remaining inside it instead of walking back and forth between it and the Town Hall. Likewise, everyone harvests lumber, but, in the case of the Undead, it is actually Ghouls, the race’s basic melee units, that perform this task rather than their standard workers, the Acolytes. Furthermore, the Night Elves, who have a great affinity with nature, do not chop down trees but instead send their Wisps to “bond” with them and extract their resources non-destructively. Little touches like these show that Blizzard is not intent on making these changes simply for the sake of being different, but has instead worked hard to make them thematically appropriate. The regal Humans, with their imposing castles and fortifications, have the strongest defences in the game, while the Undead, who are running rampant across the world and spreading their plague, can only build on ground that has been “infested” by Blight, which renders the land sickly and allows nearby Undead units to heal more quickly. Admittedly, many of these ideas initially appeared in Starcraft in a similar form (the Blight is nothing more than a variation on the Zerg’s “Creep”), but all the same we’ve come a long way from the days of the first Warcraft, in which the only real difference between the Orcs and the Humans was the colour of their skin.

The game comes with a single player campaign which involves all four races. Strictly linear in its structure, players progress from one level to the next, maintaining their principal hero units’ abilities, experience and inventory items, but with one’s performance in one level generally having no direct result on the next (this is very different from the Myth games, where basic units who survived one level would progress to the next with more hit points and better weapons). It is in this campaign that Warcraft III becomes rather disappointing. Starcraft’s storyline, while not of the same quality as RPG greats like Planescape: Torment, was at least engaging and dramatic, and populated by believable characters that the player could relate to. The ongoing banter between Raynor and Kerrigan in the Terran campaign, for example, was amusing and touching, and made Kerrigan’s betrayal to the Zerg at the end of the penultimate Terran mission surprisingly heart-wrenching. In Warcraft III, however, most of the plot developments are predictable, being lifted either from other game storylines (Arthas’ corruption by the Lich King mirrors the infestation of Kerrigan) or from the work of JRR Tolkien, whose influence permeates through every single fantasy mythology created since the mid-1950s. At times, the narrative even repeats itself, with the characters of Arthas and Illadan going through almost identical arcs as they are influenced by the forces of evil. The pacing is generally not particularly well handled, either, with Arthas’ growing obsession and descent to the dark side not coming across as remotely believable. The campaign also lacks the epic scope demanded by the storyline of an entire world at war, and the decision to focus on small-scale battles disadvantages the credibility of the single player mode. Only on one occasion - during the final Orc level - does the campaign come close to being awe-inspiring, as the sky turns red and giant demons constructed of stone and fire come crashing to earth. More moments like these would have made the campaign less of a slog through a series of predictable and rather easy missions (the entire 34-mission story, including two tutorial maps, can be completed in a couple of prolonged gaming sessions).

The entire graphical presentation is also at odds with the nature of the story. The Warcraft games have always favoured a colourful, exaggerated, cartoony appearance (in comparison to the more realistic Starcraft, and competing franchises such as Age of Empires and Myth), and the third instalment is no exception, with the rather basic polygonal models actually coming across as quite lively in spite of the move to 3D. In the previous games, the storyline itself was restricted to separate mission briefing screens, but, with Warcraft III, the bulk of the plot development has been shifted into scripted events that use the game engine itself. This means that, when grotesquely caricatured figures, whose mouths flap about in a thoroughly over-animated style, are talking about the end of the world, it’s all a little difficult to take seriously. In this respect, the pre-rendered CGI FMV sequences, which introduce the game and bookend each section of the campaign, and are rendered in a more photo-realistic style, are much more effective. Add to this some rather poor voice acting, which tends to be either too bland or too over the top, and it becomes clear that Starcraft was the better game in terms of unifying narrative and gameplay.

As an overall gaming experience, Warcraft III is a solid effort. The presentation is reasonably strong and the multiplayer and player-versus-computer skirmish modes are well-balanced and entertaining. The single player campaign, however, is a let-down, while the smaller scale of the conflict detracts from the worldwide, epic nature of the storyline. As such, Starcraft is still by far the best strategy game experience on the PC, and remains a benchmark that, in nearly nine years, Blizzard has yet to match.

8/10.

HD DVD review: Miami Vice

Miami Vice is ultimately close to two and a half hours of posturing, insincere characterisation and abrasive style, none of which would suggest, barring the appearance of his name during the opening credits, that a filmmaker of Michael Mann’s calibre was behind it. To describe it as a failed experiment would be charitable: a mess is a more accurate description.

Colin Farrell and Jamie Foxx don their designer shades and head out to the beach as I review Universal’s recent HD DVD/DVD combo release of Miami Vice.

Kerbang! Boom! Crash!

My copy of Operation Crossbow (R1 USA) arrived from DVD Pacific this morning. As I mentioned back in August, back in May 2006 Warner gave fans the chance to vote for which catalogue titles they would like to see released. The only title in the list that appealed to me was Operation Crossbow, a World War 2 spy/action movie that I’d loved ever since I happened to catch it on TV back in the early 1990s, so naturally it was the title I voted for. Apparently I’m not alone in my love of this film, for it was one of the five titles announced for a December 2006 released (another five will be released in January).

I’ve seen the film several times before, but never in its original 2.35:1 ratio. Uncropped, you really come to appreciate the scale of the piece, especially the cavernous underground set in which most of the film’s second half takes place. Warner’s transfer is also very nice: it’s certainly not a Casablanca or Citizen Kane style of restoration, but that suits me absolutely fine, because it looks just as I would expect a film from 1965 to look, with grain, white flecks and the occasional visible splice. I was a little concerned, initially, by the fact that the only English track on the disc is a 5.1 affair, but it turns out that the 70mm prints of the film were accompanied by a 6-track recording, on which I presume the DVD’s track was based.

But what of the film itself? How does it stack up after all these years? Very well, for the most part. It certainly runs hot and cold, thanks to a rather uneven pace and an inability to keep the focus on the spies/saboteurs once they enter the underground rocket lab (it keeps jumping back to London, where the goings-on are considerably less interesting). Sophia Loren, who gets top billing, is also wasted in a role that turns out to be not much more than a glorified cameo. Otherwise, though, this is a great mindless romp that keeps me engaged despite the two-hour running time. It’s no Where Eagles Dare, that’s for sure, but it is the sort of movie you can pull out every few years and still find as entertaining as it was the first time you saw it.

DVD review: My Summer of Love

Universal have not exactly rolled out the red carpet for My Summer of Love, which would be forgivable were it not for the fact that more materials than are on offer here clearly existed. As a UK film by a UK-based director, the lack of a commentary on this release when one exists for the US version is surprising and also rather unfair, while the absence of a 5.1 track makes this package feel like a rather second-rate effort.

Much to my chagrin, I recently discovered that, when I converted my entire site over to the new version 9 layout, I forgot to do anything about the various DVD reviews hosted on the site. I’ve now finished converting them, meaning that the site is now finally complete (for real this time), and I decided to throw in a special holiday bonus: a review that had been lying around, partially complete for several months: My Summer of Love (R2 UK). Check out the full review, but watch out, lads - it has lezzies in it! LOL!!!11~

Mann oh mann

This morning, I received a review copy of the HD DVD/SD DVD combo of Michael Mann’s Miami Vice courtesy of DVD Pacific. I’ve never seen the 80s TV series on which the film is based, so I really didn’t know what to expect.

All I can say is that I’m glad this was a review copy and thus something I didn’t have to pay for, except with the two hours and twenty minutes of my life that I’ll never get back. Miami Vice is an incoherent mess, an eyesore and assault on the ears. It’s one hundred and forty minutes of Colin Farrell and Jamie Foxx slicking back their hair and/or adjusting their shades as they swagger around various seaside locations with their jaws firmly set and their designer shades glinting in the sunlight. The plot feels like your average 45-minute cop show stretched out to beyond the normal length of a feature film, while the characters are nothing more than mere archetypes who spit out corny dialogue and offer us glaring insights into their tedious and insincere emotions.

Style-wise, the film is all over the place. Mann shot it using a combination of traditional 35mm and 1080p high definition. Some of it looks fine, but the night scenes look absolutely vile, filled with obnoxious amounts of digital noise. Meanwhile, a whole lot of scenes have what can only be described as a motion blur effect, presumably the result of shooting the footage interlaced and then deinterlacing it for the final transfer. Mann used similar techniques on his previous film, Collateral, and they were just as bad there. If this is the future of cinema, I think I’d prefer to remain in the past. Oh, and the camerawork is dreadful, too: I get that Mann wanted to convey a sense of urgency, but when your viewpoint is jittering all of the place, Blair Witch-style, I feel ready to vomit rather than being drawn into the action.

Simply put, this is the worst film I’ve added to my HD collection thus far. A 3/10 is, I feel, extremely generous. Not recommended. The disc itself, however, is very good, with an array of extras that I’ll no doubt have to plough through and a solid transfer that does the best it can with the uninspiring quality of the source materials.

HD DVD review: Serenity

With the UK release of Serenity, Universal have done what, five months ago, I wouldn’t have thought was possible: taken my favourite HD transfer of all time and improved it. No, I don’t think I’d recommend that everyone who already owns the US version immediately rushes out and picks up the UK release, but the difference is there. If you don’t already have the US disc, be in no doubt: the UK release is the finest-looking digital video disc this reviewer has ever seen, and Universal and their competitors are going to have their work cut out one-upping this beauty.

Eight months after HD DVD first launched, it’s double-dipping time! I’ve reviewed the recent R0 UK release of Serenity, investigating whether Universal’s new, more efficient transfer is any different from its predecessor.

Wolf Creek

As the first HD DVD I’ve seen from the Weinstein Company, Wolf Creek is a bit of a mixed bag. It has moments that are genuinely impressive, but on other occasions, technical issues that could probably have been avoided get in the way. However, it goes without saying that this is the best the film has ever looked outside a theatrical environment or the original camera recordings, so, if you are HD-capable, this is definitely the version of the film to pick up.

The Weinstein Company jumps aboard the HD DVD bandwagon this month with a variety of releases. I offer a sneak preview of Wolf Creek, an effective exploitation horror piece from the land down under.

V for Vendetta

For all its flaws, I admire V for Vendetta for being ballsy enough to tell a mainstream audience that blowing up buildings can be a legitimate means to an end. Warner’s HD DVD release is far from the top echelon of high definition releases, but it constitutes a solid package overall, and the improvements to image, audio and extras should be enough to convince those who already own the DVD to upgrade.

Remember, remember… Okay, so it’s the 5th of December rather than the 5th of November, but I’ve reviewed the recent HD DVD release of V for Vendetta anyway.